After you gone the months it takes to become a Complaint Free person, you will find that you will have changed.
To paraphrase Gandhi, you have become the change you wish to see in the world .
When something goes well for you, your immediate response is “of course.” And when a challenge presents itself, you don’t give it any energy by speaking about it to others; rather ,you begin to look for the blessing in it. And seeking, you find.
You will begin to feel gratitude for the smallest things even thing you used to take for granted.
As you settle into being Unconscious Competent, your default mind- set will be one of appreciation. You will still have things you desire for yourself, and that’s good. Now with your newfound positive energy, you can hold an image in your mind of what you yet desire, knowing that it is, even now moving toward you.
Your financial situation may improve as well. Money is, in and of itself, without value. As you begin to value yourself and your world more, you will vibrate at a level that attracts greater financial benefits for yourself. People will want to give and provide things for you that you may have had to pay for in the past.
Positive, happy people are simply more enjoyable to be around.
Your attitude, which is an outward expression your inner thoughts, dictates how people will relate to you. Not only people, but animals as well.
We all want to be around people who make the everyday extraordinary. And those
people are most likely to ultimately get promoted.
“But what about social causes that I’m passionate about? I’m often asked. “How can I help bring about positive change if I don’t complain?” Again, change begins with dissatisfaction. It begins when someone like you sees a gap between what is and what can be . Dissatisfaction is the beginning, but it can’t be the end. If you complain about a situation. You may be able to draw others to you who will bellyache along with you but you won’t be able to get much done. However, if you can begin to speak in terms of what it will be like when the challenge no longer exists, when the bridge is gapped, when the problem is solved, then you can excite and move people to positive change.
As you cease to complain, you will find yourself less often in fear and anger. Anger is fear directed outward. And because you are no longer a fear – based person, you will attract fewer angry and fearful people into your life.
“Complaining is a form of manipulation.”
Some say, “But some psychiatrists believe complaining is a healthy thing.” As I’ve said,
it does make sense to complain (express grief, pain or discontent) on occasion. And an expression of grief, pain, or discontent directed toward someone who can actually help is healthy – so long as it’s done in a way to receive what you want in the future and not as a means of attacking someone about the past.
Talking to a psychologist or other counselor about challenging events in your life as a way of getting past them can be healthy.
There are times when we all need to process what’s going on in our lives to get a better handle on our situation. Processing and complaining are not the same thing. Processing and complaining are not the same thing. Processing is sharing your FEELINGS about something that has happened. If your boss yells at you, you may want to talk to your spouse about the experience and share how it made you feel. “
I felt surprised and sad when she yelled at me,” you might say.
When processing an experience, make sure that what you are saying is centered on
only your feelings and not your story of what happened. Use words like:
“I feel angry when you do that” owns the experience as yours and is processing. “I feel like you’re a jerk when you do that” is simply name – calling, but putting “I feel “before the attack. Your feelings are the best indicator of how well you are living in integrity with your highest self, and discussing your feelings with another, without the backstory and drama of “he said/ she said,” can be healthy.